A Queen’s Menu: ZALO Queen Review

This is a sponsored post by HoneysSX.

Some toys are clit suckers, and some are g-spot vibrators, and some are percussive vibrators, and some have warming capabilities or app control. This ZALO Queen G-Spot Vibrator review looks at a toy that attempts to do all of those things. It’s a menu of options fit for a queen. While they didn’t all work for me, I admire the versatility and ambition. Go for broke, ZALO.

First Impressions

The ZALO Queen comes in some gorgeous packaging. The box is black with gold embellishments, and it has a clear cellophane-style plastic over the toy itself, a viewing window. Between the black box and the reflective window, I was seriously challenged to photograph this packaging.

Queen outer box

This is the Queen Set, which includes the toy and also the sleeve to turn it into a clit sucker. Inside the box, you get both of those plus a charging cable, instructions, warranty card, and a satin storage bag.

Everything you get in the box

That’s a lot of stuff all in one bag!!

The Queen

The actual ZALO Queen is an interestingly-shaped vibrator with a rounded, angled g-spot head on one end and a flared base/collar on the other.

The G-spot end (top right image) has a slight raised bump in the middle that’s hard to see in these pictures, but it is the focal point of the percussive sensation. The wider collar end has a single button in the middle to activate the vibrator’s warming feature. And if you don’t see any buttons, well, it’s not because there aren’t any: the two main buttons are on either side of that s-curve metallic embellishment in the last picture. One button controls the g-spot percussion and the other controls the whole-body vibration.

The Queen has a magnetic charging port at the back of the collar end.

Magnetic charging point

Clit Sucker Attachment

Then there’s the clit sucker attachment which looks like a surprised ghost, or like one of those Dumbo Octopuses.

Judge for yourself.

These are clean and fresh out of the box, by the way. They pick up cat hair and fuzz just by looking at it, so if you see streaks, that’s why.

The bottom flaps (whatever you want to call them) of the clit sucker attachment are very flexible. Here’s me demonstrating this quality in an image that looks mildly disturbing.

Opening the clit sucker's flaps

Function Options

To use the Queen as a clit sucker, slick down the body of the toy and the inside of the attachment with water-based lube. Then squeeze the attachment down over the g-spot end of the Queen. It’s a very snug fit, but if you lube everything up properly, it does go on fairly easily.

The clit sucker attachment is powered by the same part of the Queen as the g-spot percussive end. That’s a tapping motion where the middle of the g-spot end pushes in and out by a few millimeters. It’s designed to feel like fluttering against the g-spot, or when the clit sucker attachment is on, it pushes and pulls the air around the clitoris.

There’s also a regular full-body vibrator in the Queen that makes the entire shaft vibrate. You can use this feature on its own or in conjunction with either the clit sucker or the g-spot percussion. And, of course, you can turn on the heater if you want your toy pre-warmed. There’s also an app, and I’ll talk about the app separately later.

In Use

I tried this toy a number of times with its different permutations because they’re not easily interchangeable. I’ll discuss that in kudos and caveats.

Clit Sucker

The clit-sucker attachment was underwhelming for me. There’s air movement caused by the percussive motion of the g-spot end, but it’s not enough to develop much of a suction. It felt like ZALO was trying to take advantage of the clit sucker trend without making an actual clit sucker. If anyone has used any of the other pressure wave devices like the Satisfyer Penguin or Womanizer Premium, they will not be fooled by this knock-off attempt.

That said, the clit sucker does produce a nice amount of stimulation around the clitoris, which I found pleasant. The nozzle hole is not very large, so it’s not friendly to large clits and requires some alignment. Once aligned, it provides a pleasant vibration and thrumming around the clitoris that you could maybe mistake for suction. Maybe.

Percussive G-Spot End

This feature is one of the best features on the Queen. The quick tapping, rather than a more diffuse vibration, provides some pleasant stimulation. The intensity is variable; you can push the button and make it tap faster or harder or in patterns.

Internally, I couldn’t feel this a lot. I could feel it a bit, but maybe my g-spot isn’t sensitive enough to this particular type of tapping. I think one of the biggest hindrances for me, which could be a benefit for someone else depending on their anatomy, is that the G-spot end of the toy is not really thick. So while it’s a pleasant sensation, it doesn’t press hard against my g-spot like a thicker toy would. I can, however, maneuver the toy to press against my g-spot, and then the sensation is more noticeable.

Despite this being billed as a G-spot feature, I really liked the percussive tapping against my clit. This isn’t marketed as an external vibrator, but you do what works, right? And I enjoyed trying out this end as a clit stimulator instead. I’m aware of the irony inherent in the fact that I didn’t love the clit stimulator attachment for this end, but I like it for clit stimulation *without* the designated attachment.

Vibration

The general vibration feature within the Queen is pretty buzzy. The intensity has a wide range, and you can get a really strong vibration, but that vibration is very surface-level. This is fine when using the vibrator externally, since the clitoris often responds fine to those kind of vibrations. The toy advertises itself for the G-spot, though, and those vibrations are not internally impressive.

Please note, though, that I am a bit of a vibrator snob. If you like buzzier vibrations, or if a strong vibrator is enough even if it’s not rumbly, you’re going to be just fine with this.

The App

Now, one of the great features of the Queen is the ZALO Remote app. The app itself isn’t wonderful in its own right. It doesn’t have any instructions that I could see or make work. It also doesn’t seem to have a function to connect to a partner. You’re controlling your own toy, or someone in the room with you is controlling the toy with their phone. This isn’t a distance feature. But the app provides some really neat functionality that makes the Queen a lot better toy.

The app asks you to choose between a selection of modes. They’re fairly standard to other vibrator apps: wave patterns, music-connected, pulse patterns, touchscreen control. But the patterns combine both the g-spot percussion and the main body vibration, integrating and swapping seamlessly between them so the stimulation seems to move. I imagine it’s possible to recreate this with the manual buttons on the toy. Seems much harder, though. This made the app a much better option than just pushing the buttons on the toy if you want to have both types of stimulation at once.

Kudos and Caveats

Buckle up, because the ZALO Queen is a mixed bag. Many kudos and caveats to come.

Kudos for beautiful packaging and an elegant toy. Everything about the branding is class and quality. The manufacturers clearly care about what they’re presenting. I appreciate the storage bag, too, because those should be standard and aren’t.

Kudos for magnetic charging and a fully waterproof toy. At this price point, if you can’t take it in the bath or shower, it’s almost an insult. But you can! So that’s great.

More kudos for versatility. With a clit sucker attachment, G-spot percussive end, vibrations, warming feature, and an app, the Queen really does provide a queen’s assortment of ways to use this toy.

Caveat: The clit sucker ghost cape attachment thing is a pain to put on and take off. Once it’s on, that’s the only way you can use the toy. This means committing to one style of play for the entire session, or dealing with a lot of fumbling and extra lube mid-session to change. If you’re going from clit stimulation to internal stimulation, you now have a floppy lube-covered silicone flap to put somewhere until you’re done playing.

Mixed kudos/caveat for the shape: the angled g-spot head is a thoughtful design, and the body of the toy is on the slimmer side. This is great for those who prefer slimmer internal toys but not so great if you like a bit more thickness.

Caveat: the buttons on the toy are hard to find. They blend into the design. I kept finding myself poking around the S-curve decoration trying to find the buttons while it was in use.

Kudos for strength! You can really crank the percussion and vibration up high. Plus, they’re independently controlled, so you can customize your enjoyment if that’s what you prefer. And if not, you’ve got the app to blend them.

Kudos for an app that combines several of the best functions of the toy. For me, the app connected easily and stayed connected throughout the session, even when my phone screen went to sleep.

Caveat: the app could use better instructions, and lots of the reviews complain about the app hanging during different functions. Also, not being able to connect a partner in any way I could find means the app is limiting its potential usefulness.

Caveat: the app displays number of calories burned. This is definitely inaccurate since it doesn’t take into account height or weight or anything else. There’s no way I burned 360 calories by having a vibrator sit inside me for 15 minutes, sorry. Also, calorie counting can be really triggering for a lot of folks. There seems to be no way to turn that feature off.

Final Thoughts

The ZALO Queen Set really wants to provide a one-stop sex toy experience. Whether you want a clit sucker, a g-spot tapper, an internal vibrator, or a warming vibrator, the Queen aims to please. My main quibble is that it doesn’t do any one of these things exceptionally well. It’s fine, and it’s fun to have all these different options, but I wouldn’t choose this over a more specialized toy.

I think this is a good toy to give as a gift, especially for someone who’s just not sure what they might like in a sex toy. It’s really beautiful and versatile. The neat quality of the percussive tapping is almost enough to win out over the less-useful functions for me, but not quite. I wanted to love the ZALO Queen set, but it’s not a favorite for me. Don’t take my word for it, though: if these features sound intriguing, you can definitely pick one up for yourself. Otherwise, you can pick up any number of fabulous vibrators on HoneysX.

This is a sponsored post. This does not impact the honesty of my review.

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