This post is second in a multi-post series about sex toys. For the other parts, click here: Part 1 | Part 3 | Part 4
Welcome to Part 2 of the Wide World of Sex Toys! This post comes to celebrate National Masturbation Month, occurring right now (right now!) in May. Once you finish reading this post, feel encouraged to celebrate this fine month of self-love.
Vibrators
Things That Go “Buzz” In The Night
I’ll bet that for most women, their first purchased toy was a vibrator. And there’s a reason: homemade dildos are easy, but homemade vibrators are a bit more challenging. Personally, I got my start as a vibrator fan through those squiggle pens. Hilariously, when I Googled “squiggle pen” just now, this link came up first: apparently I wasn’t the only person using these pens for more than writing notes. I’ve also heard electric toothbrushes are a decent substitute, but in today’s market, buying an actual vibrator is probably cheaper.
There are so many different types of vibrators with so little in common that they barely fit in the same category.
“Kind Of Looks Like A Penis” Insertable Models
“Doesn’t Look At All Like A Penis, At Least Not An Earth Penis” Insertable Models
“Sure, It’s My Back Massager” Models
Shot Through The… Heart? Bullet Vibes
A seriously under-developed subset of bullet vibes are remote-control bullet vibes. If you’ve read Purely Professional, you know that remote-control bullet vibes play a major role in some of Max and Bridget’s public play. Unfortunately, I had to take a lot of creative license to invent the perfect remote-control toy. I’ve tried two wannabes: the bNaughty and the Club Vibe 2.OH. Both, frankly, left me underwhelmed, especially given the price. The stimulation isn’t very strong, and the remote control is sporadically effective. When, oh when, will they make a good, small remote-control bullet vibe? Toy companies, get on this! And, dear readers, if you know of any good remote-control bullet vibes, leave me a comment!
The “Twice As Nice” Models
mows the lawn washes the car does the dishes (damn, all these clichés sound sexual in this context!) does lots of fancy stuff, you’ll pay for the pleasure. But in a way, that’s what all vibrators are: paying for the pleasure.
The Category-Straddlers
Some vibrators fit in multiple categories (Heh. Fit in.) or no category at all. For example, some vibrators are made to be worn: they have harnesses to hold them in place for clitoral stimulation, or they fit over your fingers. Some vibrators are shaped for external stimulation but don’t look anything like bullets. Just because I don’t categorize it here doesn’t mean it’s not worth trying!
In Summary
Vibrators are varied and fun. They range in price point, style, and functionality, so don’t be afraid to buy many different kinds and experiment. Chances are, you’ll find something that makes you go buzz in the night, too.